French Lesson: Gay Dating Vocab Not to Mix Up

Having trouble with French words on Grindr or Tinder? It’s no surprise. The French language is full of cognates – words that look like similar words in English. When their meaning diverges, however, they are called faux amis, or “fake friends.” They can often cause confusion for English-speakers on dating apps when looking to meet or hook up in Paris.

Trust us. We know.

So if you read these on an app or hear one out in the wild, take heed. It may look like its English equivalent, but it’s definitely not. A little twist in the context can also make a big difference. Here are some of the most vital ones to know.

1. Grave: In French this tends to be used all alone as an emphasis word to mean something like, “Yeah, definitely.” It doesn’t have any deathly connotations. Used as an adjective with a noun, however, it does mean “serious” as in English.

2. Copain: Like companion in English, this word generally means “friend” in French when used with the definite article. But be careful. If a guy says, “Mon copain n’est pas là,” he’s likely saying his partner isn’t there, so you know what you’re getting into.

3. Une affaire: This word, unlike its English counterpart, has nothing to do with liaisons. It simply means “a matter” usually relating to business. “Un homme d’affaires” isn’t a man who has lots of affairs – it’s just a businessman,

4. Célibataire: Don’t worry, it doesn’t mean celibate. It just means they don’t have a “copain” in the romantic sense. They’re single! Proceed accordingly.

5. Engagé: Don’t look for a ring here. “Engagé” simply means engaged in a social or political way, or even just engaged in conversation over coffee.

6. Une douche: If a guy offers you “une douche” after a hookup, don’t look at him weirdly. He’s just offering a shower – the normal kind we take all the time.

7. Rester: If he says he wants to “rester la nuit,” however, he’s not just taking a catnap. He wants “to stay” the night. Feel free to tell him, “non.”

8. Sale: If someone types, “Tu es sale,” they’re not calling you cheap or for sale. They’re calling you dirty – which may or may not sound better.

9. En location: When a guy talks about being “en location,” or more often “en colocation,” he’s referring to his rental status, not to his physical space. Renters are called “locataires” in French.

10. Un préservatif: If a guy asks you about “le préservatif” during some heavy petting in bed, it’s not raspberry or strawberry preserves – not by a long shot. It’s a condom! People still use them in France, and while there are other synonyms, this one causes the most confusion for English speakers.

There are plenty more words and phrases to learn whether you’re out at the bar or trying to score on the apps. Brush up on your French Grindr vocab and dating terms before jumping into the wild. Have a look at some of our other recommendations and start educating yourself!